When you realize you’re a Jew… and alone

I received another email from a person who woke up to being a Jew after October 7. It is so hard to suddenly realize you have a larger identity, a larger family and are hated by much of the world. Add to that that people who reach out to me have often lived a completely secular life and have no Jewish connections. They are stunned and standing alone.

The first thing I do is reassure them that they are not in fact alone. Every Jew in the world is with them. We are all in this together. Your level of identification or observance is of no interest to anti-Semites; you are a Jew. You are a target. But you are also immediately a part of a spirited family.

The second thing is to connect them with that family – Jewish community. Fear is easy when you are alone. One of the most powerful aspects of Jewish community is resilience. Right after October 7th there was panic. But very quickly the Jewish will to survive surged. Hearing from Israelis as they feed, clothe, and care for the injured and displaced is empowering. Even better is to do it yourself. Whether you give money, volunteer, or both, doing something fights the sense of powerlessness.

Third, many have next to zero Jewish knowledge. They are identifying with… what? I am asked for books that will expand their understanding of what it is they have discovered themselves to be.

The individual who recently contacted me is also the child of Holocaust survivors. On one hand they have lived a life without religion because their parents turned away from it. On the other, they are suddenly Jewish with only the negatives of anti-Semitism, none of the joys. This person writes, “Can you teach me the wonders of our religion”?

Shabbat begins this evening. The sages teach that Shabbat is one of the greatest gifts we are given. Take a moment this evening to absorb and rejoice in your greater family, know that you are not alone and that peace will come someday.

Some resources:
*Take a class on basic Judaism – knowledge is empowerment.
*Starting at the very beginning? Read What I Wish My Christian Friends Knew about Judaism by Robert Schoen. It discusses Judaism from a very American perspective.
*Looking for some “magic” – read Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel’s book, The Sabbath.
*Want to be a part of the Jewish community? Subscribe to Jewish emails and get a dose of community on a regular basis. Try My Jewish Learning and your local Jewish newspaper and/or synagogue. Consider a national email like The Forward.
*Pick some Jewish practice to take on. It could be as simple as lighting candles on Friday night before dinner. You don’t have to say the traditional blessing; you can simply pause and know you are connected to millions of other Jews.