A young Chinese Jew sent the following letter to my Mixed and Matched column – My dad is Chinese, not Jewish; my mom is white and Jewish. They raised me Jewish. My last name and my looks are Chinese. In my home congregation, no one pays any attention to my mixed race, but in other…
Read More »Mixed & Matched
Pain makes it hard to listen to the views of others

It can be hard to hear another person when the words in your head are drowning out their voice. Everyone deserves to be heard out. If someone else’s experience is being blotted out by your own pain you may need to be heard out before you can listen to that person. Try to sort out…
Read More »I want my Parents to be Buried Together
Here’s a question I got from a teenager: My mom is Jewish, my dad is Catholic, and my brother and I were raised Jewish. Last month they told us they had recently written their ethical wills and each plan to be buried in the cemetery of their own faith. I was so stunned that I…
Read More »Putting an Irish element into your Jewish wedding

A Jewish woman wrote to me asking about how to include something Irish in her wedding to reflect her fiancé’s Irish heritage. Here’s what she asked. My fiancé and I are starting to plan our wedding for next spring. Neither of us is particularly religious. I’m proudly Jewish and he is Irish and was…
Read More »What should you do when a loved one dies?

(Originally appeared July 2015 in Mixed and Matched column of the J-Weekly) Recently a woman wrote to me about her first experience with death and shiva as a Jew. Here’s what she said: I am a recent convert and a single mother. My sister died recently. When I got the news, I was paralyzed…
Read More »How to Handle Kids Who Say, “Jews are going to hell”?

I received this question from a Jewish mom to my Mixed and Matched column: My husband was raised in a nominally Christian family. We are raising our kids Jewish. Our oldest is going to public school in the fall. I feel like I should prepare our son for the inevitable Christian child who tells him,…
Read More »