About 2 percent of Americans are Jewish.  Somewhere around 10 – 15 percent are gay, lesbian, transgendered, bisexual.  So how easy is it to be Jewish & gay and find another gay Jew?  You do the math.  It won’t surprise you to learn that most LGBT Jews are in interfaith relationships.  There are things about being interfaith that are standard fare – what will we do about the holidays?  what will our wedding look like?  how will we raise the kids?  where will we find spiritual community?  sometimes I feel weird about how Jewish/Christian/Hindu/secular you are.

Some things are unique to LGBT interfaith relationships.  We have both suffered from prejudice, alienation and rebuff.  We may be worried about our child having a role model from the “other gender.”  Our income tends to be lower than straight couples.  One or both of us may have been rejected by our religious or cultural community.  We feel extra protective of each other and our children.

Would you like to join other LGBT couples to discuss your concerns, hopes and plans?

I am starting an Interfaith LBGT couples discussion group to be co-facilitated by Rabbi Ruth Adar.  Here’s a description.  Call or email if you are interested.

Exploring Interfaith LGBTQ Relationships
Join us for an exploration of key issues that come up for interfaith couples: clarifying values, good communication, relationships with family and friends, finding community, and joyfully sharing each other’s traditions, holidays and religious observances. This class will be a combination of discussion, readings, and guided activities. All genders welcome.

Date:    Four sessions beginning Monday, Oct. 26
Time:    7:30 to 9pm
Place:   Kehilla Community Synagogue, 1300 Grand Ave., Piedmont 
Cost:    $80/couple, no one turned away for lack of funds.
For more information call Dawn at 510-845-6420 x11.

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This Sunday is the Gay Pride Parade.

Jews from around the bay area are all getting together to march as one Jewish community. On both sides of the bay the Jewish Federations are organizing to help people carpool, get the right BART connections and get to the Jewish location in the parade. Lots of synagogues are organizing their members. My congregation has made a T-shirt for the parade and my friend, Susan, is sending out emails to get people organized. They want you to sign up if you’re coming. I plan to go early and have breakfast with the mass of Jews.

If you are interested you can find information at both Federation websites:

www.jfed.org

www.sfjcf.org

I plan to go for the breakfast in SF nice and early to beat the crowds. Plus I’ll get to visit with everyone – as you know I love to see friends! I hope to see you there.

Are you Gay and Interfaith? Here’s a program just for you:

Chosen Family:

A Discussion Series for Interfaith LGBT Couples

with Karen Erlichman and Helena McMahon

Couples with one Jewish partner sometimes face challenging decisions regarding holiday celebrations, spiritual practices and raising children. Interfaith LGBT couples, too, face a unique set of challenges. Join other couples to discuss relationships, community and creating meaningful ritual. Discover new ways to address important and sensitive issues.

All genders welcome.

7 sessions, 7 to 9pm

for dates and fees, contact Helene at 415-292-1252 or email hmcmahon@jccsf.org

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What! No chuppah?!

Did you (or will you) get married this week? We are making history this week! If you are one of the hundreds of LGBT couples who tied the knot this week, or are planning to, I want to wish you a Mazel Tov! But don’t stop there – if you want a Jewish wedding, call me. Consider being married under a chuppah.

Many are now in the throes of planning weddings. Rabbis have been performing LGBT weddings all along. But some friends have told me that they aren’t havng a religious wedding until it’s legal. Well, it’s legal. So time to think rings, flowers, friends, and food. Will it be outside, in a synagogue, in a hall, in your parents’ back yard?

What elements do you want to include? Jewish wedding elements include:

Chuppah

The Seven Blessings

Breaking the glass

Circling your partner

Ketubah (wedding contract)

Exchange of rings

Going to the mikvah

Want to discuss weddings, officiants, where to rent a chuppah and what constitutes a mikvah? Give me a call. I love wedding plans!

Posted by admin under Couples, LGBT, Relationships
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